I AM PERSUADED TO REMAIN IN THE LIGHT.
So often I am dragged into dark places. Today I am safely ensconced in a dark place. I feel secure in the rage and gloom, as I am not sure what I am really feeling. Despite Renee Fleming’s entreaties with the “Moon Song”. The music seems only to comfort the mood and wrap it in a safer blanket to keep me trapped. Twice in a seven month period I have had my car damaged and the offenders got away by fleeing the scene. I have pictures of the car and motorcycle, but it turns out that the offenders don’t have insurance coverage and one lives in New Jersey whose laws are obscure in Manhattan and will mean I have to secure an attorney.
It’s too much to bear. I am feeling soggy with annoyance and loss. I feel put upon. I feel that it isn’t fair that I should be parked in front of my house and have to suffer these two bits of injustices and have to suck it up. Did I mention that in between these two incidents another driver did shave off the blue from my back bumper as they drove too close to my vehicle?
I am just going to sit here a while and brood. I need to brood so as to give vent to my humanness. Then, I am going to look for my inner divine and wait for what my invisible God that I serve has to say. Needless to say I am presently grumpier than a rain cloud over Kansas. My feet are cold and I just can’t think straight. What a mucky set of feelings!!. Morose, blah, bland; and then the phone rings just as I am thinking to shave my head and regret it tonight.
“Dam phone”, I mutter,
“Lana, I can’t meet with you today as planned because my niece who recently had a baby was rushed to the hospital and is in a coma, I hope you can understand and allow me to reschedule.”
Can I understand? Oh shit, yes I can!!
There is a baby in his or her Aunt’s arms who may never be held by its mother if the odds rule against life. I can wait, and a cup of tea would do nicely at this time.
Lmh: cc. 1/52017